


Acrophobic Bunny

by haredevil



Category: Looney Tunes | Merrie Melodies
Genre: A Bunch Of Stinkers, Acrophobia, Daffy Being A Mean Boy, Like Outright Just A Bully, Porky Is There
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-30
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-04-15 01:36:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14149086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haredevil/pseuds/haredevil
Summary: Based on Bugs Bunny's fear of heights in the earlier shorts.Bugs wasn’t afraid of telling people he was afraid of heights, not at all. He didn’t think it attributed to a weakness. But as he watched Daffy laughing on the ground in front of him, he realised very quickly that Daffy was going to take this the extra mile. And he WAS afraid of that.





	Acrophobic Bunny

    Bugs knew that Daffy wasn’t exactly the picture of grace when it came to emotional matters. It was why he tried to limit their interactions to the pure slapstick and comedy end of things, instead leaning on Porky for the deeper-down stuff. But with a mouth like his own, and the situations Daffy liked to drag him into, it was only a matter of time before something slipped.

    It could’ve been anything simple. He cried at the end of romantic comedies. He had a celebrity crush on Fred Astaire. Anything like that. But no.

    Bugs was blindfolded, being led by the hand by Daffy. He had no idea where they were, or where they were headed, but there were definitely lots of stairs. Lots, and lots, and lots of stairs. They were going up, and Bugs would be lying if he said his chest didn’t feel a bit tight at the thought of it.

 

* * *

 

    A few days back from then, Daffy and he had been out for one of their casual hangouts in the woods. Daffy’s home by the pond was comfortably close to his own familiar rabbit hole, so it was well in their way to spend time together outside of their Merrie Melodies. It’d actually become quite a routine thing for them.

    “So after the run Porky actually came to ME and told ME that my acting was out of hand! And he’s got some nerve! Look at me! I’m the picture of grace. I have a knack for the camera and if he can’t keep up with my level of finesse, then shucks to him, buster!” Daffy flicked a branch out, sword-like in aggression as he spat out those words. It was typical for him to complain about everyone else around him when he was with Bugs. Maybe it was because the rabbit would actually lend an ear (or, ahem, seem to) as he just went on and on. Bugs rolled his eyes and skipped over a fallen log, taking only a few more steps before he heard the grunts of the duck scrambling over it to keep up. A loud thud rattled the trees as he fell face-first before the hare, before leaping up and dusting himself off to secure a spot firmly ahead of him.

    “Yeah. Nobody could ever match your level of skill, Daff. You’re a real star. A diamond in the rough.”

    “Spare me the sarcasm, rabbit. Not everyone lowers their bar to meet other people’s standards. Unlike you, my image actually takes an effort to upkeep.”

    “I think that says more about my talent than it does yours,” Bugs folded his arms neatly behind his back as he easily caught up to the duck. “You know, bein’ able to keep myself up without pushing others down, so ta speak.”

    “Psshaw!” Daffy scoffed, crossing his arms as he strode forward, “The personality doesn’t make the act!” Bugs’ eyes rolled even further back, leading his head to tilt upward and gaze at the clouds as Daffy’s words went through one ear and right out the other. “Honestly! No A-list actor has a lick of compassion in them! Only an amateur would think as m-“

    Suddenly, Daffy let out a loud, squawking scream - he toppled backwards towards Bugs, landing on his rear by the rabbit’s feet and shuffling further backwards still.

    “What the-“ as Bugs looked down he got slapped directly in the face by the branch Daffy was previously wielding. He rubbed his face and groaned, taking a step away before looking forward at what had startled his friend.

    They were at a cliff. A steep one, at that. Lumps of dirt, loosened from the edge, crumbled into the canyon below from where Daffy had stood. The duck quickly got himself upright again, straightening his feathers and regaining the poor semblance of composure he tended to have. “Look at that! Years we’ve been living here and the canyon is what nearly gets me.”

    “Y… yeah.” Bugs laughed nervously. The duck chortled to himself quietly, before turning on his tail, ready to head back.

    He had gotten to the fallen log before he turned around to see Bugs was still standing right where he had been.

    “HEY SLOWPOKE! Gonna turn to stone standing that still!” Daffy called out to him, but garnered no response from the rabbit. He seemed transfixed. Raising a brow, Daffy began to make his way back again towards Bugs. “Bugsy? Did they run out of ink? What’s the matter with ya?”

    “Huh? Oh, n-nothin’, doc. Just had a thought.”

   Daffy stepped in-between Bugs and the cliff, causing the rabbit to look up in what seemed like a daze. “Don’t try anything funny with me, rabbit. I got wings. If I’m prepared, you ain’t gonna cause me death by falling, no sir-ee.”

    Bugs met Daffy’s eyes and he cracked a nervous smile. “A… A’course, wouldn’t dream of it, Daff.” The duck furrowed his brows at that. He squinted at Bugs, and caught the run of a shiver up the rabbit’s spine.

    “What is going ON with you, Bugsy? Ya look like you’ve seen a ghost! Somethin’ down the cliff?” Daffy stepped aside again and looked down the sheer edge. Bugs’ eyes followed.

    There wasn’t anything there, really. Just lots of space and height. Hard floor hundreds of feet below.

He gulped.

  Was it getting closer?

    It curved around his field of vision - intensified. Blurred around the edges, as if he were falling, and suddenly he was sweating, and his legs rattled.

“Bugsy?”

 

* * *

 

    When Bugs found himself grounded again, he was back in his rabbit hole, seated haphazardly on his own couch. He lifted his head upright wearily.

    “Your television doesn’t work.”

    His ear twitched.

    Daffy was still here. He’d figured if any amount of time passed without Bugs being there to give him attention, he’d have been out of there lickety split. But Daffy had stayed, and seemed to have been trying to make himself comfortable in the downtime.

    “I live underground.”

    “Why’d you even GET a television if it isn’t gonna work? That’s ridiculous.”

    “That’s a cabinet mirror, Daff.”

    “You’re ridiculous.”

    Bugs sighed and got up, only to find his legs still weak - he tumbled back onto the chair. After flicking his feathers into the right position and grinning at his own reflection, Daffy strode up beside him.

    “You’re a bit green in the face there, ol’ pal.”

    “Ehh… tryin’ a new look.” Bugs’ head rolled back - he still felt dizzy. How long had he been out for?

    “It’s awful on you. What even happened?” Daffy leered down at him.

    “Just another dizzy spell… you know how it goes.” Bugs tilted his head to look at Daffy, who had his hands planted firmly on his hips.

    “What, a tranquiliser? I didn’t see Elmer up there.”

    “... Not quite, doc, but you’re gettin’ warmer.”

    Now it was Daffy’s turn to roll his eyes. “I’m not gonna play charades with you, rabbit. Not with somebody with such low-quality, bottom-of-the-line acting as you.”

    Bugs laughed - weakly, as a shock to himself. “Just forgot my mornin’ coffee and carrots.” It only took a moment for Daffy to look over to the sink, spot the recently-used coffee mug, and turn back with a sour, tired expression.

    “Yeah, right. Look Bugsy, I’m not falling for more tricks. Fool me once-“

     “Shame on me, I know.”

     “No, you nincompoop! Shame on YOU! Let me finish. Fool me twice, shame on-“

     “You.”

     “No, ME you ignoramus! Do you even know the phrase?!” Daffy spat inadvertently into the rabbit’s face as he began again, “Listen here, rabbit. I’m curious as a cat - and slick like one too - and I’m not letting up ‘til you explain what happened back there.”

    Bugs wiped his face purely out of habit, lowering his eyelids at the duck. “Eeeh, nothin’ more needs ta be said. I’ve got my story and I’m stickin’ to it.”

    “Hogwash! Malarkey! Allow me to use my highly-developed deductive reasoning to deduce distinctly the details of the predicament.” More spit all over the place. It was a wonder the rabbit hole wasn’t caving in from the moisture - and suddenly, Daffy had a detective hat on, and was holding a pipe.

   The detective tapped his chin. “...You got hit by a blow dart.”

    “Nope.”

    “Someone sneaked somethin’ funny into your coffee - wasn’t me.”

    “Nah, I think I’d pick up on that.”

    “No way… You realised deep inside that I’m the better person, and your classiness is a sham, and how important I was to you in that moment of danger?”

    Bugs blinked. “So close.”

    Daffy threw up his arms in a grand, heaving groan of exasperation - “JUST TELL ME WHAT’S UP. DOC.” The pipe clunked to the floor loudly behind him.

    “Alright, alright!” Bugs sat forward, leaning on his forearm against the arm of the chair, closer to Daffy. “You earned it. I’ll tell ya. Your sleuthin’ nearly hit the nail on the noggin, but there’s something you’re missing.”

    Daffy stared at him, almost in anticipation.

    “I’m scared of heights, doc.”

    “You’re scared of heights.”

    Bugs nodded. “Goosebumps on my goosebumps, I tells ya. No better place to be than beneath the ground - not ehh, 500 feet above it.”

Daffy was silent for a second - Bugs wondered if he’d even been listening, until he broke out into hysterical laughter.

    “Scared of heights!” He rolled backwards into the floor, hooting and creased on the ground, “Let’s hope you haven’t peaked yet! Might wanna stop while you’re ahead of the HEIGHT of your popularity!”

    Bugs just watched him, and smiled slightly at the sheer glee Daffy took in mocking him. He wasn’t afraid of telling people he was afraid of heights, not at all. He didn’t think it attributed to a weakness. But as he watched Daffy laughing on the ground in front of him, he realised very quickly that Daffy was going to take this the extra mile. And he WAS afraid of that.

 

* * *

 

    And so, flash forward a few days to the Now. Daffy’s hand was sweaty by the time they reached the top of the stairs, and Bugs didn’t need to have vision to know that the duck looked a real state compared to him - although he felt frazzled himself.

    He heard the sound of a door creaking open, and immediately was hit by a gust of wind that nearly knocked him back down the flight of stairs they’d just spent the last eternity scaling. Daffy recovered from his panting to lead Bugs forward into whatever cold room he’d led him to, patting his arm and residing next to him.

    “Ohhh Bugsy! You can take that blindfold off now.”

    Bugs reached up and easily unfastened the clumsy knot Daffy had done him up with. He took the blindfold in his hands and looked out across a wide, open cityscape. He wrinkled his nose in confusion, lost at what he was supposed to be seeing - until he looked down.

    “OH MY F-“

    “Language!” Daffy exclaimed, shoving a hand over the rabbit’s mouth. Bugs grabbed his arm and yanked it off, screaming at him over the howling wind.

    “YOU TOOK ME TO THE TOP OF THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING?!”

    Daffy, seemingly ignorant to the mess he’d just caused for the rabbit, puffed his chest out indignantly. “Sure did, bucko!”

    Bugs exclaimed in fear and toppled backwards to the floor of the building, shuffling backwards across the ground.

    “WHY? WHY WOULD YOU THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?”

    “Well gee, Bugsy, thanks for the gratitude. ‘Oh wow, Daff! You’re so kind and considerate for helping me overcome my fear of heights!’ ‘What a kind, handsome, attractive gentleman you are!’ ‘I owe you my life!’”

    “I OWE YOU A SLAP ACROSS THE FACE!” Bugs had made his way back to the door, clinging onto it like an anchor in a tornado. His whiskers were in tangles and his ears, crooked, clung to the back of his head.

   Daffy had his arms outstretched. “Let loose a little bit, you’re so tense! Feel that breeze!” He paused for a second, before bringing his arms in to hug himself. “More than a breeze, actually. Say, aren’t we closer to the sun up here? Should be like summer!"

    “Daff!” Bugs yelled over another gust of wind screeching over the skyscraper. At least he felt more secure with something to hold onto. “I’m heading back down right now!”

    Daffy immediately snapped to attention at those words. “Ohhh no you don’t!” Before Bugs could blink, Daffy had slotted himself between the rabbit and his escape route. He was pressed firmly against the door and had his eyes fixed on Bugs.

    “Out of my way, you maroon!” Bugs intended to wave his arm outwards as part of the gesture, but he found it was stiff and jittery.

    “You’re not even close to the edge yet!”

    “I’ve been close enough for today! For eternity! I’m outta here!”

    Daffy’s chest puffed up and he pressed his face firmly against the rabbit’s. “Listen up, you punk. We’re friends. Pals. Amigos. Ain’t we, Bugsy?”

    “You’re on THIN ICE, featherhead.”

    “Let me explain myself!” Daffy had removed himself from the door, instead beginning to push against Bugs’ chest, leading them further out onto the rooftop again. “After what happened a few days ago I thought to myself, being such a kind and caring man as myself-“

    Bugs pushed back against Daffy. They had made their way halfway across the top of the building. “You’re really still on that?”

    “Shut your mouth.” Daffy regained control, and continued his assault. They kept moving. “I thought to myself, Daffy, Bugs could do with a favour. Show how much he means to you. It’ll do you both a world of good.”

    Bugs cut him off again, tone even more aggressive. “A world'a good?! You’re killin’ me up here! There’s no way this is gonna help with my fear'a heights! I can’t even believe you’re still ON that! It was nothin'!”

    “What can I say? Details over the bigger picture. Even a B-list actor like yourself has to work on his flaws, you know.”

   They had come to a stop again. “A fear ain’t a flaw! Sure I got ‘em, pronunciation problems up the wazoo, but that’s nothin’!”

    Daffy grinned. “I’d say the flaw beneath you is also ‘nothin’, Bugsy!”

Bugs froze. A gust of wind blew upwards from beneath him. He hesitated - his head slowly turned downwards.

  There wasn’t a floor beneath him.

    A scream rattled the skyscrapers - Daffy swore he heard a window shatter - and in a split second, Bugs was stuck to him like glue.

    “Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat! I almost-“

    Daffy tried to peel the shaking rabbit from him. “Almost cost me my ear drums, you idiot! Keep it down, will ya?!” He held the limp bunny in his arms and dropped him to the ground beside him with about as much grace as a garbage truck. This was the first time he’d ever seen Bugs look so meek. He’d say he enjoyed the rush of power, but he knew Bugs wasn’t going to let this slide - the cowering rabbit beside him was simply too busy fearing for his life to turn it against his rival. The duck scoffed at him.

     “What a wuss. Can’t handle a thousand feet.” Daffy had begun to tread idly across the ledge of the building - starting into some kind of dance along the edge. “That’s the difference between you and me, bucktooth. Embracing. One’s. Fears." He wiggled his rear with each word for emphasis in front of the petrified rabbit. "A star knows when to face the music - knows when to leap into the unknown - slip into another pair of shoes-“

    Daffy was abruptly cut off by a misplaced step - he slipped, and toppled over the side of the building. Within a second, Bugs was at the edge, leaning down and gripping to his friend’s hand for dear life.

    “HOLD ON DAFF!! I GOT YA!” He yelled down over the screeching winds and began to yank Daffy upwards. His feet teetered on the edge of the building - the last thing between him and a 400 metre drop - but it wasn’t enough. He lost his grip to the ledge, and Daffy shrieked and Bugs screwed his eyes shut as they both began to fall.

    But they didn’t.

    It took a minute for Bugs to crack an eye open, just to see the duck laughing hysterically in front of him again. Hesitantly, and with great labour, he peeked the other eye open - Porky was there, grinning from ear to ear, holding some kind of cable.

    “What the…”

   He glanced about him. He looked up - they’d barely fallen ten feet.

    “THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE!” Daffy cracked out into a guffaw, “ICONIC! STUPENDOUS! AMAZING! Highlight of your career! Porky, you’d better have gotten a photo of that like I asked.”

    Porky wringed his hands, “N-now now, D-Da-Daffy, for one you didn’t even ask, you threatened m-muh-me.” He made his way over to Bugs, whose body was wrapped in knots, and put a hand on his shoulder. “For two, l-look at him, you’ve shocked him half to d-de-duh-... you’ve petrified the poor guy.” Daffy let out another scoff in response, turning away to look across the wide cityscape.

    Bugs was still seeing stars - his heart was pounding a mile a minute, and he daren’t look anywhere below straight eye level, but he warily began to untangle himself. “W-What the heck is goin’ on?!”

    Daffy whacked a hand at Porky’s back, prompting him to begin an explanation as Daffy folded his arms and watched with the sickening pride he always had. “W-well, Daffy was telling me about, about your ac-acroba-acrophobia-“ Bugs glared at Daffy.

    “What? You said yourself it wasn’t a flaw! Seemed pretty happy to tell me! Why not Porky?” Bugs continued to glare. "It was practically a favour."

    The pig continued, “I said to him, you should b-be-buh, Bugs, you should try to work on it, and then he came up with the window-cleaning platform-“ That was when Bugs noticed the chord of the platform they were on - and that Porky had been there waiting the whole time. It only took a second to connect the dots.

    His look of shock turned into a sharp glare at the duck. “Oh, so you were tryin’ to TRICK me?”

    “Trying? I SUCCEEDED AGAINST YOU, RABBIT!” He slapped his knee and hooted, “Consider it payback for all the times you got me shot. You’re no saint yourself.”

    Bugs rolled his eyes, and moved to get up, keeping himself plastered safely against the inside of the platform. “Alright, alright. Ya got me good. What a smart aleck you are, playin’ on my fears. A genius.” The duck grinned again, and slicked back the feathers on his head - only for them to bounce right back. “Alright Porky, reel us back up. I think we’re done here.”

    Porky nodded, “Right away, Bu-B-Buh-... old pal!” He rubbed his hands against his jacket and took a hold of the cord. “These new platform things… I’m t-te-telling you, those window cleaners, they’ve got it hard… Amazing what modern t-te-tuh… technologies can get you.” He yanked at the cord to bring them back up.

 

    It snapped.


End file.
